It is Friday, it is thirty degrees, and let us be honest, no real work is getting done this afternoon. So we don't pretend otherwise. Cast off, grab the crew, and point the bow at the coolest water in town. Run this one in order, it is a proper afternoon out, and by the end of it everyone is a happy shade of lobster.
Start at the Postjesweg quay dock by the Rembrandtpark, where the crew climbs aboard. From there it is a short hop to Tabakszaak Suri on the Surinamestraat to load the cool box: booze, ice, ice cream, and a stop at the tobacco shop while you're there. Get it all aboard before the sun does its worst.
Next, lock through the Nieuwe Meersluis. Quick how-it-works if you haven't: a sluis (lock) steps you between two water levels. Wait off the gates for the green light, follow the keeper's signal in, take it slow, loop a line loosely around a bollard, and hold on while the water does the work. It is calmer than it looks, and this one sits on the Staande Mastroute, the standing-mast through-route.
Past the lock, open up a touch for some breeze and run out to the Nieuwe Meer. Drop the anchor, dive straight in, and accept that everyone is turning a healthy pink by now. When the inevitable "I need a toilet" goes up, the public toilet at the Wetlandbrug in Buitenveldert sorts it. It is a busy, narrow corner, so take the approach dead slow.
Then it is back in for one more round at the Nieuwe Meer swim spot off the Riekerweg, the last proper dip of the day. Dry off, and let the sunset belong to Het Bosch Waterfront Kitchen on the Jollenpad: the final cocktails of the day with the boat in sight and the light going gold, before you point the bow for home. Such a day.
A few honest notes. The Nieuwe Meersluis is a working lock, so expect a wait and share it calmly with bigger traffic, following the keeper and the signals. The Nieuwe Meer is open water, so mind the wind and the boat traffic, anchor clear of the fairway, and swim at your own risk. We show each swim spot's official status right on its page here, refreshed daily from the city's zwemwater data, so tap the stop and check it before you go in. The Wetlandbrug stretch is narrow and busy, so slow right down. Docks are first come, first served, with the signs on the quay the final word. And the heat is real, so rig some shade and drink more water than you think, or the lobster joke stops being a joke.